


Self Validation

by keepbeachcityqueer



Series: Queen of Hearts [6]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Family Fluff, I know it's weird but bear with me, Sister-Sister Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 08:34:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7567369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepbeachcityqueer/pseuds/keepbeachcityqueer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After realizing Sardonyx's true feelings, Amethyst turns to her sister for advice</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self Validation

Amethyst finally had Sardonyx to herself after a long evening of watching her woo her usual crowd. They went to the beach to spend the rest of the night together. Amethyst noticed the significant slack in her companion’s form as she laid her head in her lap, no doubt tired from her show. Sardonyx played with Amethyst’s hair, twisting it in small braids as she looked out across the ocean, the crescent moon’s reflection across the surface rippling slightly with the passing winds.

“The ocean’s so pretty.” The taller woman sighed. “Calm and still… Unlike you.” She smiled down at Amethyst

“Yeah… You’re right. Wanna go skinny dipping and make some waves?” Amethyst gave her a cheeky smile and received a gentle smack to the forehead, but afterwards was replaced with a kiss.

“I’m gonna miss you when I leave, pumpkin.“ She said sweetly. “You and your silliness.”

“I’m… Gonna miss you too.” Amethyst didn’t take her eyes off of hers as she moved to sit up, leaning against her elbows. “I’m gonna miss you a lot. But you should be excited. College, right?”

“Yes, but there won’t be anyone as cute as you there. You’re the perfect little distraction, sweetie.” She laid a hand on her cheek fondly.

“I guess I am…” Amethyst sighed into Sardonyx’s hand. “Sometimes I just sort of… Think about… What it would be like if we were… A thing, you know?”

“A thing?”

“You know… A couple.”

“Oh…”

Sardonyx’s tone alarmed Amethyst, and she looked at her. Shame covered her features, and she didn’t look Amethyst in the eye. “What’s so ‘oh’?”

“Amethyst… Listen to me.” Sardonyx guided the smaller girl to sit next to her, and held her hand tightly. Amethyst’s heart dropped before she even began to speak again.

“I had a lot of fun with you. But it was… Short. Fleeting. This couldn’t possibly work while I’m gone. I have to think about myself, darling, I told you this before. Surely you understand.”

Even though she had attempted to prepare herself for a blow, nothing could have ever made her ready for the sinking feeling in her heart. Amethyst felt like the glowing stars in the girl’s eyes were changing from light brown to dark, black holes- cruel, cold… strange. Pain was spreading slowly like poison within her. She yanked her hand free from Sardonyx’s and stood up, glowering at her as her eyes filled with burning tears.

“You’re _always_ thinking about yourself!” She yelled. “It’s always about you! This entire time I thought you actually cared about me- about how _I_ felt! But I was just…“ Her fingers curled into fists, and she turned her head away, shutting her eyes tight. "A distraction…”

“Amethyst…” The taller woman looked hurt, and laid a shoulder on Amethyst’s shoulder, but it was quickly shrugged away.

“Didn’t I… _matter_ to you…?”

Sardonyx stared at Amethyst with a mixture of shame, regret, and sadness. She tried to speak, but words failed her. She couldn’t even defend herself against the pain she had caused.

“I gotta go.” Amethyst turned, jamming trembling fists into her pockets. “Have fun at college.“

Amethyst didn’t even look back as she left the beach. Her whole body was aching, and tears were spilling from her eyes. Small, choked sobs were coming from her and she tried her very best to suppress them. She resisted the urge to do something harmful and instead went home. She knew her father was at at work, so she slammed the door shut behind her and took a deep breath.

“OPAAAAAAL!”

Her yelling was met a moment later with footsteps pounding furiously on the ground, followed by the appearance of her sister in the hallway, clad in shorts and a tank top, brandishing her bow at the ready. She lowered it when she saw that there was no threat, but a small sister standing there, shoulders shaking from her sobs. She lowered the bow.

“Oh, Amethyst…”

* * *

 

“And then she just fucking sat there and didn’t even say or do _anything._ ” Amethyst said angrily. She was sitting across from her sister on her bed, neglecting the cup of the triple scoop root beer float Opal had made her to ease her heartache. Opal herself had made a lighter sherbet float that she ate while attentively listening to her raging sibling.

“I… I wanna hate her, I wanna hate her so bad, Opal,” Amethyst continued, sniffing as she felt another onslaught of fresh tears burn her eyes. “But I don’t. I can’t. Not after how she’s made me feel.”

“That’s okay.” Her sister nodded. “A lot of people would hate her. But she’s made you feel important. She has a special place in your heart.”

“More like all of it.”

“Still, she really needs to look at how she’s been viewing things.” Opal continued. “This entire time neither of you were on the same page. You can’t let her go thinking it’s okay to treat you like a toy to play with each summer. And you have to stop brushing stuff aside and know your worth.” She tapped on her arm for emphasis. Amethyst sighed.

“Yeah but… That’s hard… I never felt like I was worth anything before I met her.”

“That’s the problem. You depended on her to make you feel good. In a way, both of you sort of used each other for self-validation.”

“Uh, in layman’s terms, genius?”

“You used her to feel important, she used you for attention.” She said simply. “She didn’t respect you and you trusted her. Both of those things are essential and all partners need to give and take those things for a bond to survive. You see what I’m saying?”

“Yeah… I think so.” Amethyst sipped at her dessert thoughtfully. As much as she wanted to avoid Sardonyx, she needed to talk to her soon. She was leaving in less than a week. She was still wounded, but, like Opal implied, things would only get worse if she didn’t demand Sardonyx’s respect, nor if she didn’t speak her mind. She couldn’t run from her problems forever.

“Thanks, Opal,” Amethyst said bashfully, eyes downcast into her cup. “It’s really nice havin’ you around when you’re not away playing Robin Hood and saving the world.”

Opal chuckled. “I’ll save you before I save anyone else. Now eat your ice cream, its melting.”

 


End file.
